While packing for my next trip, a last minute whim leads me to throw in an extra piece of jewelry; just because...."one never knows". Often I go back, attending to places on the chain which have become tangled in my hurry. There are knotted places in the chain and in my stomach as I contemplate the daunting task at hand. My shoulders rise and tighten as I focus determinedly, hoping I won't break the fragile, lovely and delicate chain.
Slowing my life down recently, I've noticed telltale "knots" on the gold chain of my life. These feel edgy and unfamiliar, yet somehow they are relieved to finally be truly seen. In the midst of my decision to focus on untangling I will probably alienate some people. I am risking being misunderstood. This is my greatest fear.
As I sit here untangling these knots, I want to be remembering a core truth. What people think of me is none of my business. The chain of my life will flow better and be sturdier, truer in its state of "untanglement". I'm sensing a resultant inner contentment and ease, even amidst the uncertainty of the process. This chain may end up being stronger than I thought.
What do you think?
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You are inspiring, Glenna. I have a friend who often reminds me of the risks of embodying the authentic self. Years ago we weighed the risks -- who would we lose if we stepped into authenticity? Was it fair to those who had depended on the continuing presence of less-authentic personnas we had worn? We decided to go for it, and to support each other in doing so. I'm sure some people fell away, but funnily enough I can't remember them. The ones most dear to my heart are still here :)
ReplyDeleteGlenna, we pay a price for everything, but the highest price would be being on our deathbed and realizing that we had used all of our precious but finite moments living someone else's life. Sometimes the phrase "carpe diem" may seem hedonistic, but really is there any way to live but to seize each moment and experience it, and ourselves,and others, in true authenticity, true originality, true Being? When we slow down, and listen deeply from the inside-out, the Light of who we are, and who we are meant to be, shines more fiery than ever, illuminating more clearly in the mists which way we should go. Take those moments of Sacred Stillnes, Glenna...they are the ever present "cocoon moment" for your ever-emergent Butterfly-Self. Untangle those knots in the "waiting" and don't doubt the time spent patiently and loving doing it! Love you!
ReplyDeleteChristine Phoenix-Green
http://thegreeningspirit.wordpress.com
Lisa and Christine: Thanks for your comments. I am knowing what I am wanting in terms of living authentically. Sometimes it is a bit scary and messy to be in that authentic place, but I am enjoying this cozy cocoon and the energy that comes with feeling real - kinda like the Velveteen Rabbit! : ) You two should meet someday. You would love each other. Christine, can we recruit you out here to our mountain top retreat in Yakima? Hope so! Lots of love xxoo
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